Sunday, January 22, 2006

Fool's Gold at the Globes

I need to express my disgust, dismay and disbelief at Dennis Quaid's homophobic and ignorant (is that redundant?) interjaculation as a presenter on the 2005 Golden Globes awards show.

Introducing "Brokeback Mountain," clearly a forerunner in the Oscar race and one of the most powerfully poignant movies ever made, Quaid demonstrated his backwoods brain when he said:

“Our last nominated drama tells the story of two young cowboys who met in the summer if 1963 and forge an unexpected, lifelong connection that proves the endurance and power of love. It’s a controversial film. It’s…let’s just say it rhymes with ‘chick flick.’”

Wait. Let me get a cotton swab and clean my ears. Did he just say what I think he said? The camera panned to a panicked and dumbfounded audience. I say dumbfounded, because they found that Quaid was the inspiration for the movie "Dumb and Dumber."

Rather than enlightening viewers, Quaid's tacky comment promoted and perpetuated intolerance. Why is there the need to label this film anyway? I am so tired of the "gay cowboy" moniker rather than just acknowledging it as a film about forbidden love. Certainly it is not the first of its kind, not by a long shot. Many films and TV shows have come before with homosexuality present in the storyline and even main characters.

  • Philadelphia - Tom Hanks, gay man dying of AIDS
  • The Children's Hour - Shirley MacLaine & Audrey Hepburn, teachers who suppress desire/attraction for each other
  • Bound - Jennifer Tilly & Gina Gershon, hot lesbian sex scene
  • Dog Day Afternoon - Al Pacino, gay man robs bank to pay for lover's sex change
  • The Crying Game - Stephen Rea falls for Jaye Davidson, transvestite... even Forest Whitaker's character is gay
  • TransAmerica - Felicity Huffman, transgender man to woman
  • D'Lovely - Kevin Kline as bisexual Cole Porter
  • Capote - Philip Seymour Hoffman as openly gay Truman Capote
  • Breakfast on Pluto - Cillian Murphy as gay transvestite
  • Soap - Billy Crystal as gay man
  • Will & Grace - entire sitcom centered around gay characters
  • In & Out - Kevin Kline & Tom Selleck as gay men who kiss (gasp!)
  • The Hours - Ed Harris, Meryl Streep, Nicole Kidman, Julianne Moore, Allison Janney - all gay characters!
  • The Birdcage - Robin Williams & Nathan Lane as gay partners
  • Making Love - Harry Hamlin & Michael Ontkean get it on (1982!)

Hidden/Forbidden Love based on inter-racial or class differences:

  • West Side Story - White boy and Puerto Rican girl
  • Guess Who's Coming to Dinner - Sidney Poitier courts Katherine Houghton
  • Far From Heaven - Julianne Moore loves Dennis Haysbert
  • Jungle Fever - Wesley Snipes has affair w/Annabella Sciorra

Why is our society more accepting of two women being intimate than two men? Is it because the heterosexual male has fantasies of being with two women? Do straight men fear that they might get aroused watching two men embrace or simulate copulation?

Was Quaid's comment his own, or a script blunder on the teleprompter? Based on the crowd's uncomfortable silence and squirming, methinks it was the former, not the latter. Clearly Quaid's masculinity was threatened by "Brokeback Mountain."

He needs to cop to this and issue a formal on-camera apology. Quaid's agent, manager, attorney and publicist should strongly advise him to do some image repair and damage control. I, for one, will consider boycotting any movie in which he appears, until he removes his foot from his mouth and does a major mea culpa.

Doesn't Quaid realize that people might think he's gay since he seems quite comfortable with his head up his ass?

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